Underwear, schmunderwear

What ever happened to just going out and buying a 12 pack of underwear from walmart? You could pick from your favorite super hero, pretty pink butterflies, flowers or rainbows. Life was simple and underwear was easy! Shit, I know what happened...I grew up!

As Victoria's Secret was so kind as to send me a gift card for my birthday, I went underwear shopping. I will admit, I have always been a bikini style underwear buyer. Those just seem to work well for me, none of the dreaded crack crawlers, butt floss, or granny panties. When I walk in to VS I normally go straight to "my drawer" and grab what will match my bras. Yes, I am kinda anal about that...my panties must match my bras. Anyway, as my 42nd birthday rapidly approaches, my mind said.."hmmm, maybe you should try something else out?" Stupid mind...

So I browse. Brief's, boy cut, bikini, string bikini, cheeky, thongs, etc. Words on my ass or not? In glitter or just print? All lace? No lace?  So MANY choices, how on earth can you choose? After deciding to be adventurous I grab some new styles and check out. I take my new pretty's home, wash them up and try them out...

Boy Cut? Hmmm, my first thought is that I must have them on backward. So I do the ole switcheroo. Nope, had them right the first time. UGH, really?? Not very comfy at all. The seam running up my crack doesn't feel very good at all and makes me rethink the thong briefly. After I wear them I decide that these were probably wasted money. My body just doesn't seem built right for this trend!

Cheeky? Uhhh, wow...not much left to imagine back there. If my ass was almost 22 instead of 42, these actually wouldn't be all bad and maybe even a new style for me. They were fairly comfy and considering how they looked, the whole crack crawl wasn't an issue. Better than the boy cut, but maybe I am a touch bit old for these? Can you be too old for an underwear style? What if I am in a car wreck and the nurses in the ER laugh at me?

Lace? Not too bad they fit just like regular bikini panties but are pretty much see through. I had decided that these are a NO due to my modesty issues. Then it dawns on me: " I don't parade around in just my undies! No one will see them except me, hubby and maybe the occasional Doctor or drinking buddy!"  Yeah, these might work for "special" occasions (like when Hubby is gonna get lucky).

Imprinted w/ Words? While the fit isn't all bad, do I really need "Juicy" or "Hot" written on my ass? I think a plain old "Yes" or "No" would probably work just as good, if I am going to advertise on my undies. Again, my age factors into this as well as the horror of realizing my son may do a load of laundry and find my "Juicy" ass undies and that could scar him for life!

Thong...bahahahahahahaha!  I have tried a thong several times...from the age of 20 up until my latest underwear adventure. I just don't get it. Maybe I should be more worried about a pantyline than I am. I just don't think having a string up my crack is all that beneficial. I think me digging at myself trying to make my bum more comfy is way less attractive than you being able to see my underwear line. Nope! Sorry Hubby, you will just have to like the thongs on TV!

Ahhh, my old friend...the classic Bikini style. Why did I ever consider anything else? Nice fit, good and comfy, they don't creep where they shouldn't, and they are as sexy as they need to be. They cover what I feel needs covered, you can't see through them, a nurse probably won't laugh at them, and they won't freak out a child who may do a load of laundry.

So my thought for the day is this... Is change necessary? Sometimes, but if it fits, it is comfy and works, why change? Do you have to try new things out to realize what you already have works the best? Maybe, but you should try new things judiciously and not throw out the old just because something shiny catches your eye. Because it could turn out to be a pain in your ass that you are stuck with because you threw out old reliable. Is dressing up what you know works sometimes a good idea? Of course it is! Duh!

Am I talking about my underwear or am I speaking life lessons? You decide.  Happy Bikini Thursday folks!